I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
