At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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