There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
