This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Randomize