Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize