Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
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