Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
