Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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