Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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