I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize
