She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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