so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
