The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
