Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
he told me I talked like a deaf person
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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