So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
