a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
