Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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