Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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