What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
