are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize
