You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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