dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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