What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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