I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize