I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
