your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
