My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
it's like iHOP with fire
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
