Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
