Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
My vagina just recognized that song.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
