Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
