First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
My ass is underappreciated
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
