I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
