So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
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