So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
