Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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