Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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