We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
