That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
The air was thick with penises
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
There's even glitter on my cock...
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