Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
