We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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