i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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