He is an equal opportunity slut.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize