he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
you win again, gameday.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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