I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
