no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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