I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
