woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
