I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize