How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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