yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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