OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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